jotd

[cam76034]

A couple decided to go out to eat at a Chinese restaurant. After looking over the menu, they both decided to have Chicken Surprise, the chef's special. The waiter brought their meal in a lidded pot. As the wife reached for the lid, it rose a few inches. She could see two beady eyes looking out before the lid slammed down. Startled, she asked her husband if he had seen the eyes. Just then, the lid rose again, revealing the two eyes before slamming down again. Perturbed, the couple called over the waiter and explained the situation.
"I apologize," he said. "I mistakenly brought you the Peeking Duck."

[channelmaniac]

Chicken? What chicken?

[onething]

Chicken? What chicken?

[cam76034]

Two aliens landed in the Arizona desert near a gas station that was
closed for the night. They approached one of the gas pumps and the younger alien addressed it saying, 'Greetings, Earthling. We come in peace. Take us to your leader!!

The gas pump, of course, didn't respond.

The younger alien became angry at the lack of response.

The older alien said, 'I'd calm down if I were you.'

The younger alien ignored the warning and repeated his greeting. Again, there was no response.

Annoyed by what he perceived to be the pump's haughty attitude, he drew his Ray gun and said impatiently, 'Greetings, Earthling. We come in peace. Do not ignore us this way! Take us to your leader or I will fire!'

The older alien again warned his comrade saying, 'You probably don't want to do that! I really don't think you should make him mad.'

'Rubbish,' replied the cocky, young alien. He aimed his weapon at the pump and opened fire. There was a huge explosion. A massive fireball roared towards them and blew the younger alien off his feet and deposited him in a burnt, smoking mess about 200 yards away in a cactus patch...

Half an hour passed. When he finally regained consciousness. He
refocused his three eyes, straightened his bent antenna, and looked dazedly at the older, wiser alien who was standing over him shaking his big, green head.

'What a ferocious creature!' exclaimed the young, fried alien. 'He damn near killed me! How did you know he was so dangerous?'

The older alien leaned over, placed a friendly feeler on his crispy
friend and replied, 'If there's one thing I've learned during my
intergalactic travels, you don't want to mess with a guy who can loop his penis over his shoulder twice and then stick it in his ear.'

[channelmaniac]

Plaxico Burris on Gun Safety

[cam76034]

LOL! For real!

[sammm]

Plaxico Burris on Gun Safety

Poor Plexiglass.

[aalvarez04]

Channelmaniac wins this thread. Nice vid.

[Nails]

That was funny but staged obviously.


This one wasn't.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZE3QAeYRk-A

[Ataim]

THis one even funnier.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sVPa4...eature=related

[Titus]