ORDERING PIZZA IN 2008

[sammm]

This is so close to what is probably going to be happening in 2008 that we are not sure how funny this really is...


Operator: Thank you for calling Pizza Hut. May I have your national ID number?
Customer: Hi, I'd like to place an order.

Operator: I must have your NIDN first, sir.
Customer: My National ID Number, yeah, hold on, eh, it's 6102049998-45-54610.

Operator: Thank you Mr. Sheehan. I see you live at 1742 Meadowland Drive, and the phone number is 494-2366. Your office number over at Lincoln Insurance is 745-2302 and your cell number is 266-2566. Email address is [email protected]. Which number are you calling from sir?
Customer: Huh? I'm at home. Where'd you get all this information?

Operator: We're wired into the HSS, sir.
Customer: The HSS, what is that?

Operator: We're wired into the Homeland Security System, sir. This will add only 15 seconds to your ordering time.
Customer: (sighs) Oh well, I'd like to order a couple of your All-Meat Special pizzas.

Operator: I don't think that's a good idea, sir.
Customer: Whaddya mean?

Operator: Sir, your medical records and sewer sensors indicate that you've got very high blood pressure and extremely high cholesterol. Your National Health Care provider won't allow such an unhealthy choice.
Customer: What?!?! What do you recommend, then?

Operator: You might try our low-fat Soybean Pizza. I'm sure you'll like it.
Customer: What makes you think I'd like something like that?

Operator: Well, you checked out 'Gourmet Soybean Recipes' from your local library last week, sir. That's why I made the suggestion.
Customer: All right, all right. Give me two family-sized ones, then.

Operator: That should be plenty for you, your wife and your four kids. Your 2 dogs can finish the crusts, sir. Your total is $49.99.
Customer: Let me give you my credit card number.

Operator: I'm sorry sir, but I'm afraid you'll have to pay in cash. Your credit card balance is over its limit.
Customer: I'll run over to the ATM and get some cash before your driver gets here.

Operator: That won't work either, sir. Your checking account is overdrawn also.
Customer: Never mind! Just send the pizzas. I'll have the cash ready. How long will it take?

Operator: We're running a little behind, sir. It'll be about 45 minutes, sir If you're in a hurry you might want to pick'em up while you're out getting the cash, but then, carrying pizzas on a motorcycle can be a little awkward.
Customer: Wait! How do you know I ride a scooter?

Operator: It says here you're in arrears on your car payments, so your car got repo'ed. But your Harley's paid for and you just filled the tank yesterday.
Customer: Well, I'll be a #%#^^&$%^$@#

Operator: I'd advise watching your language, sir. You've already got a July 4, 2003, conviction for cussing out a cop and another one I see here in September for contempt at your hearing for cussing at a judge Oh yes, I see here that you just got out from a 90 day stay in the State Correctional Facility. Is this your first pizza since your return to society?
Customer: (speechless)

Operator: Will there be anything else, sir?
Customer: Yes, I have a coupon for a free 2-liter of Coke.

Operator: I'm sorry sir, but our ad's exclusionary clause prevents us from offering free soda to diabetics. The New Constitution prohibits this and I want to Thank you for calling Pizza Hut.

[onething]

Aint technology great

I understand WalMart is starting to use a device that tracks inventory by radio.

Do you have your three sixes yet?

[channelmaniac]

I understand WalMart is starting to use a device that tracks inventory by radio.

Yup! It's called RFID

Do you have your three sixes yet?

Not me... I'll wait until they want to implant that in my body.

RJ

[Dave04]

Yup! It's called RFID

I have to admit, I don't understand the paranoia surrounding the RFID tags at Walmart... it's not like they are trying to stick a RFID tag on each shopper to track where they go in the store. They're using it for inventory (they can just walk a scanner up and down each aisle and inventory is done) and possibly use it for check out in the future (no more waving the product over the barcode scanner 50 times, just run the cart through the line and your done).

Maybe I'm missing something...

[channelmaniac]

It's the abuse of RFID and using it to store sensitive personal information or to track a person's buying and spending habits that have everyone concerned.

Can you imagine a store putting readers around different aisles and using that to track what you have in your cart and where you walk around the store and spend your time? They can correlate that with purchases and what's on the aisles to use it for rearranging shelf space...

However... What's to stop them from trying to read the RFID tag that you will one day have in your pocket to keep personal info on. Driver's licenses with your records, Insurance cards with all your medical history, and the list goes on.

Yes there are encryption technologies for those cards but which technology will they settle on? Each has its own strong points. Heck even GSM cards can now be hacked on the fly... even with all the security that has been added in after they were first released!

Raymond

[brock]

It's the abuse of RFID and using it to store sensitive personal information or to track a person's buying and spending habits that have everyone concerned.

You do know that they have the ability to do this anyway, unless you are a totally cash consumer.

This reminds me of a guy at Kroger one night that went balistic on the cashier for asking to see his drivers license. The guy was writing a check, and when asked to produce his drivers license he started throwing a fit and accusing the cashier of being part of some identity theft ring.

It must really suck to be that paranoid.

[channelmaniac]

I agree!

Some people are whacked...

Did that guy have an aluminum foil hat on too?

[brock]

No foil hat, but the Bedford PD sure had fun trying to get him under control.

[Treibenschnell]

Question is, whom exactly will be delivering the pie?

[joe.MIATA]

This reminds me of a guy at Kroger one night that went balistic on the cashier for asking to see his drivers license. The guy was writing a check, and when asked to produce his drivers license he started throwing a fit and accusing the cashier of being part of some identity theft ring.

What this means is that you have to drive a car in order to write a check....for groceries or pizza. He should say, 'Sorry I don't drive.'...And then watch the kids face as his confusion grows into overwhelming stress as not knowing what to do next. "Manager- ailse 5- 911"

I do understand that there are other ID options, however.

[Dave04]

You do know that they have the ability to do this anyway, unless you are a totally cash consumer.

Which brings me back to my origional question... what's the beef with RFID?

Like Brock pointed out, they are already tracking our spending habits (either via credit card # or your preferred shopper card).

[channelmaniac]

More info kept on the tags... can be read without you knowing...

The pundits are worried that it will eventually be used to track everyone walking around cities and other uses that it wasn't originally intended for.

RJ

[Rpt1826]

Oh man that is so funny I am lmao over here at school

rory

[Ataim]

How about the veri chip? Currently in use in a animals to track them. Are we next?

link to site for veri chip http://www.adsx.com/prodservpart/verichip.html
link to what it can lead to http://www.greaterthings.com/News/Chip_Implants/

[Treibenschnell]

Actually, the chips are a fad in parts of Europe right now... Spanish hipsters are using them as a imbedded credit card so as not to have to carry a purse/wallet. No surprise that someone one find them quaint enough to want to have one placed under the skin!