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Thread: JOTD - bad math joke

  1. #1
    Obnoxious at any speed altiain's Avatar
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    Default JOTD - bad math joke

    An infinite number of mathematicians walk into a bar. The first one orders a beer. The second orders half a beer. The third, a quarter of a beer. The bartender says "You're all idiots", and pours two beers.




    Hey, it made me laugh.
    Iain

    "We don't stop playing because we grow old, we grow old because we stop playing." - George Bernard Shaw

  2. #2

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    LOL
    I just told my wife and she stared at me with a confused look on her face.

  3. #3
    Orange cones fear me. cone-cerned's Avatar
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    Default More math, kinda

    This 80 year old woman was arrested for shop lifting.
    When she went before the judge he asked her, 'What did you steal?' She replied, 'A can of peaches.'
    The judge then asked her why she had stolen the can of peaches and she replied that she was hungry.
    The judge then asked her how many peaches were in the can.
    She replied 6.

    The judge then said, 'I will then give you 6 days in jail.'

    Before the judge could actually pronounce the punishment, the woman's husband spoke up and asked the judge if he could say something.

    The judge said, 'What is it?'

    The husband said, 'She also stole a can of peas.'
    On the track, I am fearless.
    If you were as slow as me, you wouldn't be afraid either.

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  4. #4

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    Quote Originally Posted by altiain View Post
    An infinite number of mathematicians walk into a bar. The first one orders a beer. The second orders half a beer. The third, a quarter of a beer. The bartender says "You're all idiots", and pours two beers.
    LOL

    I cannot decide if its a good thing or bad thing that I understood that.

  5. #5

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    I suck at math... anybody want to explain it?
    09 Lexus RX350
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  6. #6

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    Meh.

    Not really along the same line, but I prefer, What do you do with an elephant with three balls?

    Walk him and pitch to the rhino.

    From Hot Shots.

  7. #7

    Default Another math-related joke

    Q: Why did the chicken cross the mobius strip?

    A: To get to the other, um, ....



  8. #8

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    Quote Originally Posted by MadMonkey View Post
    I suck at math... anybody want to explain it?
    With that particular series in an infinite pattern you will get infinitely close to 2 without ever actually arriving at 2 as each progresive iteration only takes you half the remaining distance.

    i.e: 1/1+1/2+1/4+1/8+1/16.....

  9. #9
    Orange cones fear me. cone-cerned's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by cwisenheimer View Post
    Q: Why did the chicken cross the mobius strip?

    A: To get to the other, um, ....


    Super!
    On the track, I am fearless.
    If you were as slow as me, you wouldn't be afraid either.

    1994 M Edition
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  10. #10

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    "A neutron walked into a bar and asked how much for a drink. The bartender replied, "for you, no charge."

    An atom goes into a bar and says to the bartender "Did you find an electron in here last night? I lost one".
    Bartender says "Are you sure?"
    Atom says "Yeah, I'm positive."

    Q: Why are quantum physicists so poor at sex?
    A: Because when they find the position, they can't find the momentum, and when they have the momentum, they can't find the position.

    Q: Why did the chicken cross the Mobius strip?
    A: To get to the same side.

    Radioactive cats have 18 half-lives.

    A priest, a doctor, and an engineer are playing a round of golf behind a particularly slow group of golfers. Becoming quite angry and frustrated, they call the ranger over.
    The doctor asks, "What the hell is with these guys? They're the slowest golfers I've ever seen!"
    The ranger replies, "Oh, they're a group of blind firefighters. They lost their sight saving our clubhouse from a fire last year. As thanks, we let them play for free anytime."
    The three golfers fall silent for a moment.
    The priest says, "That's very sad. I will say an extra blessing for them at mass tonight."
    The doctor adds, "I have a good buddy who's an ophthalmologist. I'll ask if he can do anything for them."
    The engineer asks, "Why can't they play at night?"
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  11. #11

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    Quote Originally Posted by TheChadVIII View Post

    A priest, a doctor, and an engineer are playing a round of golf behind a particularly slow group of golfers. Becoming quite angry and frustrated, they call the ranger over.
    The doctor asks, "What the hell is with these guys? They're the slowest golfers I've ever seen!"
    The ranger replies, "Oh, they're a group of blind firefighters. They lost their sight saving our clubhouse from a fire last year. As thanks, we let them play for free anytime."
    The three golfers fall silent for a moment.
    The priest says, "That's very sad. I will say an extra blessing for them at mass tonight."
    The doctor adds, "I have a good buddy who's an ophthalmologist. I'll ask if he can do anything for them."
    The engineer asks, "Why can't they play at night?"

  12. #12

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    Quote Originally Posted by TheChadVIII View Post
    "Why can't they play at night?"
    That's one of my favorites.

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